The Daily Rambling Artist: Lost and Found — A Circus of Thoughts

Throughout the day, I find myself concocting grand plans for what I'll put into these ramblings, as I engage in the usually hectic day. As the hours unfold and life's ceaseless bustle takes over, it's as if the universe conspires with the ebb and flow of the ocean to whisk away my musings.

There's an odd beauty in this ritual for me. My thoughts are not lost—they're just biding their time, waiting for the perfect moment to reappear. They resurface transformed, adorned with new moods, different demeanors. It's as if they've gone to a masquerade and returned wearing a different mask each time. It mimics the process of my paint studio, when I return to a piece with fresh eyes. 

It's only as I dive deeper into understanding my ADHD that I grasp why this cyclical process doesn't fill me with anxiety. Logic dictates it should be a source of distress, but I've come to realize it's part of my superpower. I've always had to wear an armor of resilience. Not just because the world outside rages with its own cacophony, but also because the very wiring of my mind echoes that chaos constantly.

It’s within this maelstrom that I found my calling as an artist. In a world where little else made sense, the chaos within the studio resonated perfectly. It became my sanctuary, a haven where I could always summon my hyper focus.

The diagnosis has given me newfound structure. I stand more aware of the moments when things teeter off balance, a skill I can wield even when I’m not on the meds.

In my research, I’ve heard it suggested more than once that the term "deficiency" in Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder deserves a radical rethink. The assertion is that it's not a shortcoming at all but rather a hidden superpower. It could be that this line of thinking is merely a comforting refrain for those who've been diagnosed, a balm for bruised self-esteem.

Even if that theory spells truth, I’m inclined to embrace this alternative perspective. After all, who wouldn't want to view their quirks as the ingredients of an extraordinary superpower?

-Sergio Santos